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Smutty Reads Blankets
Browse our collection of 67 Smutty Reads Blankets . Most designs are also available on T-Shirts, Tank Tops, Racerbacks, Sweatshirts, Hoodies and other items. Designed and printed in the USA. 100% Satisfaction Guaranteed.
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Chillin Out Maxin Relaxin All Cool Blanket
Stay fresh with this 90's inspired design. You won't be able to stop yourself from singing the rest of this famous television tune after reading "Chillin out maxin relaxin all cool.
She Wants The D Blanket
If she can read music, she wants the D. Not sure who she is? We aren't either. Show off your nerdy band geek, music knowledge with this funny internet meme parody!
Donut Talk To Me Blanket
Read the shirt, pal. You think I'm down for your useless chatter? Oh no, honey-glazed; Think again. Grab this sweet, sassy design and let everyone know that you donut feel up for small talk.
Farewell Gender Binary You Were Too Small For This World Blanket Blanket
Put the idea of binary genders in the ground with this graveyard themed design. This design features an illustration of a headstone covered in skulls that reads "Farewell gender binary, you were too small for this world.
The Hermit (Bigfoot) Blanket
Keep your distance and do some soul searching introspection with this bigfoot tarot card design! Perfect for wandering around the woods alone and fricking the EFF OFF, only to be occasionally seen on blurry photographs.
Protect the Wildlife (Mothman) Blanket
Protect the supernatural wildlife with this retro embroidery patch inspired Mothman design, perfect for spooking yourself out as you read too deeply into shadows moving in the dark, and howls in the night.
I Pet Cats For Satan Blanket
This funny satanic cat shirt reads, "I Pet Cats For Satan" and is a funny way to celebrate your love of cats but with a hint of darkness! Let's all hail cats with this dark but hilarious shirt!
Yoga Prose Blanket
Get thy yoga meditation in and show off thy nerdy side with this funny design depicting William Shakespeare doing a yoga pose with poor Yorick's skull!
Ten of Swords HedgeHog Tarot Parody Blanket
The ten of swords card is showing you that you may have spiky things sticking out your back but at least you're cute. Show off your love for Hedgehogs and tarot cards with this funny, 10 of swords, hedgehog, tarot card parody blanket.
Tarot Icon Pattern Blanket
Show your love of the mystic art of Tarot Card reading with this Tarot inspired blanket. This tarot pattern features illustrations of all 21 major arcana as well as the representations of the four minor arcana. Perfect for decorating the occult bedroom of your darkest dreams.
Tarot Card: The Tower (Of Pancakes) Blanket
In Tarot, the tower card is usually read as an omen of disaster...But this version sure isn't, unless your version of disaster is too much breakfast food! Whether you're a fan of the occult with a sense of humor, or a lover of breakfast food, this tarot card blanket is a cute, funny choice of accessory for anyone looking for cute bedding!
Amigara Fault Part Two Blanket
Whether you're a connoisseur of horror manga, or have just read a few, these holes are instantly recognizable. And at least one of them is probably made for you...If you're a fan of horror show off your appreciation with this cool horror manga inspired blanket! Sure to creep out all your friends who are familiar with the imagery!
Amigara Fault Part One Blanket
Whether you're a connoisseur of horror manga, or have just read a few, these holes are instantly recognizable. And at least one of them is probably made for you...If you're a fan of horror show off your appreciation with this cool horror manga inspired blanket! Sure to creep out all your friends who are familiar with the imagery!
Gothic Flora Pattern Blanket
Everyone knows spring is the best time of year, even for those with more Victorian tastes! With a cool breeze blowing in, you have infinite amounts of books to read, and a mild cup of tea. If you're bedroom, living room, or dorm room need of something more monotone and subtle. This floral gothic Blanket is perfect for you!
Spring Flora Pattern Blanket
Everyone knows spring is the best time of year! The sky's blue, the breeze is blowing in, you have infinite amounts of books to read, and a mild cup of tea. If you're bedroom, living room, or dorm room need a splash of color to match the season. This floral spring blanket is perfect for you!
Pro-Choice Pro-Feminist Pro-Dino Blanket
Drive the patriarchy to extinction and stand up for all bodies. This blanket design features an illustration of an anti-body shaming dinosaur and the phrase "Brontosaurs Against Body Shaming." The dino's voice bubble reads "Every Body Deserves respect.
The Devil Loves Metal Blanket
Looking for the perfect gift for the satan worshiping black metal enthusiast in your life? Look no further! This super cozy blanket which reads "The Devil Loves Metal" with a rough inverse pentagram on it is sure to impress, whether you favor black metal, death metal, or classic metal music. Warm as hell!
Liquid Wisdom Blanket
Anyone who has curled up with a warm cup of delicious tea and contemplated the complex flavors of the sacred beverage knows that tea is liquid wisdom. It opens the mind and allows you a peek at the very nature of existence. This blanket is perfect for meditation, yoga, or just hanging out and reading a good book while sipping tea. Perfect for the tea lover in your life!
Leave Me Alone To Cry Over The Deaths of Fictional Characters Blanket
Leave me alone so I can cry over the deaths of fictional characters! Anyone who gets into reading or TV series will understand the pain of losing a beloved character! Sure, it's not REAL death, but it feels like it. Warn others that you are in mourning with this funny blanket design for book and fiction lovers everywhere.
Bonum Nocte Blanket
Seize the night friend! Drink your blackest coffee, cuddle with your cats and dogs, read a good book, finish your essay that due in the morning! Just kidding, its actually way past your bedtime so you'd better call it a night. If you're a night owl looking for some fashionable inspirational phrases, this latin blanket is for you!
Dante's Lucifer Blanket
The Devil, Lucifer, Satan, Phil- whatever you call him, in the classic book Dante's Inferno, he has kind of a bum rap. Cast to the ninth circle of hell, encased in ice for all eternity. His wings beat in an attempt to escape, but only succeed in freezing himself further. So, not such a great lot in life. Or death. Afterlife? Who knows. Grab this illustrative piece today and show your love for that damn fine read.
The Scarlet Letter Blanket
Celebrate your love for literature and design with this graphic and bold illustration of the classic novel, "The Scarlet Letter" written by Nathaniel Hawthorne. If you're a fan of romance, reading, design and in general just a huge book nerd this scarlet letter blanket is perfect for you!
The Emperor Lion Blanket
This design features an illustration of the The Emperor one of the major Tarot Arcana. In this illustration the King's head has been replaced with that of a lion, he sits on a throne, his scepter is an ankh, the symbol of life and rams on each sides of his throne represent Aries. This card is representative of the desire to rule over one's surrounding among other things.
Whiskey Whispers Temptation In My Ear Blanket
A summer whiskey country blanket that reads "fireball whiskey whispers temptation in my ear." A perfect country party blanket for a southern girl that is ready to hang out on the back of a pickup truck with country music cranked loud on the radio.
Corn You Believe These Tomatoes? (New Jersey) Blanket
If you're a New Jersey Tomata for life, this funny produce oriented design is for you! Show some love for local food and farmers markets with your state crops, New Jersey! This funny design reads "Corn you believe these tomatos" and features the beloved Jersey Tomato.
Here To Crash Your Party Blanket
Maleficent is one bad bitch. Show that your are too with this Sleeping Beauty themed design featuring illustrations of green thorns and purple text reading "Here to Crash Your Party." Every good fairytale needs and evil villain that can turn into a dragon when someone tries to kick her out of her castle.
Rad Unicorn Skateboarding a Pizza Tattoo Blanket
You read that right. This sick as hell unicorn is ripping mad cheese in space, blasting out 1080 kick flips like its nothing. On top of that, it looks like it's straight off some crusty old fisherman's butt cheek. What else do you want?
Pixelated Death Tarot Card Blanket
Accept the end of things and embrace change with this trippy, colorful, pixel art interpretation of the Death Tarot Card from the Rider-Waite-Smith tarot deck!
The Witchy Urge To Consult The Cards Blanket
Every witch has the subconscious desire to draw cards from a deck that is absolutely about to call them out. Give into your urges to do witchy stuff with this groovy take on "the feminine urge" meme featuring a witch's hand holding the Sun, Moon, and Star tarot cards!
Space Heater Squad Blanket
If you're the type of person who would rather sit in the comfort of your warm and cozy home than dare go out in the blistering winter weather, then this cozy shirt is perfect for you! Our funny design reads, "Space Heater Squad" and makes a great gift for anyone who won't and can't be separated from the warmth of their space heater. Stay cozy this winter with our anti cold tee!
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